Let's start with Christmas! December 24th, I got off work at 11pm. I was still upstate in my new apartment all by my lonesome, as Dean had not yet come up from the city to join me, so I drove out to my mom's house to be with my family for Christmas morning. Little did I know, (but I really put two and two together... long story) Dean was waiting for me at my mom's house!!! It was the most amazing Christmas gift eve. I walked into the house and my mom was still waiting up for me, because she said she had a special gift she wanted to give to me before she went to sleep ;) I stretched out on the floor to stretch out my back and all of a sudden, out of the darkness of the kitchen, Dean came walking out towards me!! I almost cried. It was so amazing to see him and have him home with me for the holidays! Since then, he's been upstate officially getting used to the upstate way of life lol. It was tough at first because he was home all day with nothing to do while i was out and working, but he's finally got himself an awesome job, he's working suuuper hard, and he's feeling great.
New Year's was cool. Dean and I went to my home town and out to a local bar (Yes, I said it, pregnant me went to a bar!!) It felt really strange at first, but then I decided whatever!! I'm not harming my child by spending time with a few old friends and enjoying the time. I was NOT drinking anything so, leave me be! Haha Since I didn't get off work til 11 though, we spent the actual count down in the car driving, but at least we were out of the house and with each other =) We stayed out til about 3 and then went to spend the night at my mom's house.
January's been a lot of work, my regular schedule as well as picking up all the extra hours I can stand. I've been doing really well, but lately, the past week or so, I've noticed I'm beginning to slow down a lot more. I crave naps like you wouldn't believe. I've also been having some trouble with my back and some pinched nerves (apparently) causing this numb spot under my right lower rib in the front. Depending on how I move, it goes numb, or a sharp pain shoots through it. I know this can't be normal. I went to a chiropractor but he didn't do jack bananas for me. If anything, he made it feel worse. So I never went back. I am currently waiting on my benefit card to come through to me from my job's health plan. This card has money set aside on it to pay for medical things such as OTC drugs, office visit co-pays and more. I can use it to pay for my chiropractor once I get it! Best believe once it comes in the mail, I'm heading to the best one in town! I need some serious readjusting!! Speaking of health issues, the current status is as follows. I've managed to fail my one hour blood glucose screening. =( Because I failed it, I have to go, this Wednesday, for my three hour test. Same procedure, only longer, more crap to drink and more blood to be drawn. BOO! If i manage to fail this one as well, I will be diagnosed as having Gestational Diabetes. I am scared to death =( When I first found out, I was floored that I had failed. Even though I know it may just have been the day, I am still so worried and feel to some extent that I have failed my son. I should have been eating better and exercising more. But go figure, I have a bigger sweet tooth now than ever before! They say, with GD, that once you give birth, it goes away. And that most of the time, it can be controlled with diet and exercise. But sometimes, you have to go on insulin shots. What I am most worried about is that having GD puts both myself, and more importantly, my son, at a higher risk for developing type 2 diabetes later in life. It also puts my son at a higher risk to be overweight in life (even though, I don't see that being a problem, both his father and I are decent size for our age/height.) And most scary, I could be putting myself at risk to have what they call a "big baby." This is where the child puts on more weight in the shoulder area making vaginal birth difficult (because the shoulders are too pig to pass past the pubic bone), and often resulting in a C-section!!! I'm not ready for all of that. Of course, the moment I found out I failed my first test (I should have been below 140 and I was at 180 for my glucose levels) I was on Google self diagnosing and figuring out what I had done wrong. Now I've probably made the situation a whole lot worse in my head than it really is. Regardless, the past few days I've been eating as healthy as I possibly can, hating every minute of it! =) I am such a huge cereal lover, and go figure, cereal is HORRIBLE for a diabetic! I've been trying to cut back on fruits, but it's so hard. I can't eat the new creamed honey that I just bought last weekend from the local farmer's market. There is a whole half gallon of chocolate ice cream in the freezer that's just calling out for me and I can't do anything about it! I am constantly having to watch my carb and sugar intake. This coming from someone whose modo is, "Embrace your curves! Eat well, live happily." (Everyone at my job, who was dieting after New Year's and I was stuffing my face, this is what I get, I know!) Today, after work, my mission is to go grocery shopping for all the stuff I can have; lean meats, protein, protein, protein, some cheese and soy milk... um non starchy veggies, and fiber filled fruits, some frozen low-fat yogurt (to curb my ice cream fetish) and there's even a cereal by the pharmacy section apparently that is made specifically for diabetics... of and whole grain everything... bread, pasta etc. Sounds like an amazing diet, huh.... NOT!! But I am willing to try my hardest for my son. No more Sweet-Tarts, Jessica!! =) I will keep you updated.
Well, I've run out of time right now. I've got to get to work... I will write again soon. I've got another short day tomorrow for work, so I will finish then. Until next time, all my love, and blessings! Stay warm and healthy and happy!! =)
